After over 15 years, I found myself embarking on a journey back to Las Vegas, but this time, the experience was markedly different. It wasn't just the neon lights or the bustling streets that were new to me; it was the feeling of venturing into this vibrant city alone, armed with a suitcase of lingerie, my camera and a heart full of mixed emotions.
Las Vegas, a city that never sleeps, was my chosen destination for a week-long content creation trip. This adventure was unlike any other I had undertaken before, primarily because it marked my first solo collaboration venture in the city. The absence of my former lover and current dear friend, Jacob, with whom I have shared recent travel memories, left a void that was hard to ignore. Traveling alone, especially to a place as lively and overwhelming as Las Vegas, made me acutely aware of the solitude that accompanied my journey.
My emotions were a rollercoaster; there were moments of sheer excitement and inspiration followed by waves of loneliness. I found myself reminiscing about the times I shared nearly two decades ago with my former husband and the network of creators who we worked so closely with but are no longer in the adult industry.
I also felt adrift without Jacob. We have traveled together 4 times this past year and we both feel so safe and grounded by each other’s company. We have shared laughs, captured meaningful moments of adventure and joy, and created memories that I already treasure.
This trip, however, was about pushing boundaries, stepping out of my comfort zone, and embracing collaborating with other women on our own terms and per our own shared vision.